He was just sitting there, having the best time. As tedious as the Letter Factory song is for me, I had a lot of fun playing with him and watching him enjoy himself.
Once upon a time, there were so many unknowns about the future Sh.awn would face. He had a massive brain bleed at birth. He had thirteen brain surgeries before he was even two. How would all of that trauma transform his life? Would he sit? Use his arm? Walk? Talk?
Would he be cognitively typical?
I marvel at this kid and all that he has accomplished. Seriously, I am in awe of his determination.
In moments like this today, I have to remind myself that he was fifteen months old before he was able to sit, and even then that was with a whole lot cushioning around him in case he toppled (which he did a lot). His ability to establish a regular four-point position to crawl on his hands and knees didn't come until he was over 2.
And now?
Now I see this charming, funny, amazing kid who knows all of his letter sounds and is starting to string them together to make words. (OMG when he realized he read a real word it was the best look ever on his face. He was amazed!)
He is sitting criss-cross applesauce style in textbook fashion. For those of you who don't know of such things, this is a pretty big deal.
We're just a few days away from the start of Kinder. I can't really wrap my mind around how this milestone will change life as we know it right now. Yet even with my anxiousness, I am excited for them. I have no doubt that they are going to love learning and playing. I am fairly confident they are going to love school. Both of them will. I hope so, at least.
But there are moments when I get overwhelmed with the worry that the world won't see the fantastic kid(s) I see. The fear of sending him(them) out into the cold, hard world almost takes my breath away.
What if he isn't pushed or given high expectations or asked to perform to the best of his abilities?
What if they can't see past the walker and motor issues?
Worse yet, what if he internalizes other people's prejudgment and discrimination and allows them to extinguish his light?
It would kill me to see him hurt like that.
Because this boy?
He has a sparkle that lights up the room.
He has a laugh that will make you smile.
It's my job to make sure he stays that way.
~~~
Make me feel better and tell me you were worried about your kids starting Kinder, too, please. Then I won't feel like such a helicopter parent freak. Ahem.
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7 comments:
Definitely worried, yes. Especially after my last encounter with the school.
And now I need to go email the list of people I need to meet with before the first day, because no way do I leave my kid in someone's care without making sure they understand what his limitations are and are not.
I teach kinder (in the room where IEP students are mainstreamed regardless of challenges) and based off your pictures/words, any teacher worth their salt will see his shining light and fall in love. Students will learn to see past the walker etc and will treat him like a peer. You'll cry and worry and it'll be a big transition (work rigor, length of day) for everyone but usually within 4-5weeks everyone adjusts. Good luck!
What an amazing boy!
Ha, I was so anxious before E started Kindergarten. It's all day here. I balled on the drive home after dropping her off. I kept my phone turned on and next to me all day. I was a wreck :)
He is going to do GREAT ! What a stud. I have been with you along this journey. I have shared your fears, cheered with their accomplishments and fallen in love with these little guys.
I believe that everyone involved with them will do the same.
No fears mama.
I held my boys back. Granted their birthdays were July and August so it was easy. I remember wondering if they'd even be ready being held back a year. My fears have been put to rest and I have been made to be one proud mama. Now....the littles....I worry about :)
Right there with you, though I will admit that I am less worried now since we had a year of "prep" with Transitional K... but yeah, still worried. :-)
This makes me cry with joy for you and for him and for your whole family. Thank you so much for this post. Thank you for putting into words things that have been on my heart ... sometimes I get to focused on what they still need to do/learn (especially working on IEPs) that I forget to just pause and marvel at the incredible things they've already done or may even be doing in front of me right then.
By the way, his smile is just gorgeous!!
He sure does sparkle when he smiles! I can see it in the pictures. I think I'd be right there with you - petrified. I can't personally speak from experience, other than with my niece, but how can we not worry about them? I'm sure your boys will be absolutely fine though, and I know you will be involved and make sure that is so!
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