2015

A lot of my FB feed today is about the end of 2015. There are reflections, fond (and not so fond) farewells, and hopes for the new year. It feels a little...off...odd? I don't know. It feels strange to not be doing the same thing, and yet, I don't want to.

I think more than anything, I am somewhat leery of the new year. 2015 has not been all that bad to us, so I don't exactly wish it to end. The lows haven't been too low. The highs have been relatively frequent. I have been less stressed, less overwhelmed. I kind of like that it was quiet and generally non-eventful.

While the year itself isn't necessarily the reason behind the calm, I don't have the desire to go changing things...you know, in case.

Sigh.

Ahead we must go, however, like it or not.

So bring on 2016. I'll cautiously step aside and let you do your thing.

I'd appreciate it if you'd be nice while you do it.

It's Been A While!

It's been a while. I hate it when I let the time go too long between posting.

Things here are in their usual crazy state, but not alarmingly so. This is, of course, overwhelming (because when is life not) and underwhelming (crisis free is so...CRISIS FREE! A girl could get used to this!) all at the same time.

~~~

In a little over two weeks from now, the big boys turn eight. I could go on and on about how this blows my mind, but I think we all feel that about our kids. :) While this time of year is usually a minefield because of the events surrounding their birth, I had thought I was doing well this time. I remembered but didn't dwell on everything, and frankly, I was feeling pretty good about how I was handling things. Then FB reminded me that this is the date that my water broke eight years ago, and Bam! It all came back.

Sigh.

~~~

The big boys are in second grade this year, and things are going very well. I got to the point of regularly pinching myself to make sure I wasn't dreaming, it was going that well.

Two weeks ago brought the first issue - a big one, actually, that brought my mama bear out in full force. Just as that was resolved a new, equally significant issue was discovered. The second issue is resolved for the time being, but the whole thing has left a sour taste in my mouth.

~~~

We have started the process of refinancing our home loan. We will consolidate the second loan we got to pay for baby making while we're at it. I am wildly excited about the whole thing, as it will save us quite a bit each month. Yay.

~~~

I have been blessed with a student teacher this semester. It took us a bit to click, but at this point I'm feeling really good about having her in the classroom. (Now, remind me of this when I give over "full control" in a few weeks. That will be the hard part for me!) It's exciting to be a part of a new teacher's journey to their own classroom. :)

~~~

In July we put out a few milkweed plants in the hopes that we'd be able to "raise" some monarch butterflies. I can't tell you how much fun it has been to watch the monarch cycle. We have the whole shebang going on right now - eggs, caterpillars, and even chrysalises. We've had caterpillars eat several plants down to the stems, and we've bought just as many new plants to feed our caterpillars while the other plants regrow. There are monarch butterflies that will come to our plants even when we are right there.

I love how calming it has been for all of us. Each day we head out to check on our caterpillars. We find the new eggs that have been laid. We search for the caterpillars who have left, sometimes finding their chrysalises, and sometimes not. The boys often go over on their own and talk to them. Fun!

We love it all so much that we got my mom her own milkweed plants for her birthday. She's now just as hooked as us. lol.

~~~

I don't know if anyone is still around any more. I hope so. I'd love a wave if you get the chance. :)

#MicroBlog Monday - The Same But Oh So Different

The school is the same. The aide is the same. The kid is the same aside from some minor maturation ten weeks can give a 7 year old.

The teacher is new. The class is much more challenging. The expectations are so much higher they aren't even really on the same continuum.

And yet, the experience is oh, so different.

If you would have listened to the teacher from last year, he should be falling apart, not thriving. She made it clear she thought I was delusional by suggesting he was bright. (I can't tell you the pleasure I get from knowing this must be annoying as hell to her.)

If you would have listened to the teacher from last year, the picture painted of my boy would leave you thinking there was little hope.

I fought back. A lot.

Thankfully, someone who could make decisions had listened. And we were blessed with another amazing teacher.

One who pushes. Expects. And more importantly, one who cares.

It has made all the difference.

Everything has changed.

I've always known that teachers can make or break the experience for a child, but now I know. Living it made me feel it in a way I never had before.

Go to Mel's for more #MicroBlog Monday posts.

The Eve of the New School Year

Can you believe it is already that time again? Summer is over.

The boys start the new adventure of second grade tomorrow. Clothes are picked out. Lunches are waiting in the fridge. Backpacks are filled with supplies. The sign is ready to capture their first day excitement and looks...

But we're not ready.

We are not ready to go back to school and schedules and early bedtimes and homework.

We are definitely NOT ready for our summer to end.

I'm not going to lie. There was a little bit (or a lot) of sad mixed in with the excitement as the boys headed off to bed.

We're not ready because we've thoroughly enjoyed this summer.

While we've done quite a few things this summer, in reality, our summer has been fairly unstructured and relaxing -- something I think we all really needed, something we're not ready to give up.

So yes, we are going to really miss the summer.

We learned today that the boys will have our desired teacher next year. She is upbeat, energetic, and caring, exactly what you'd expect an elementary teacher to be and the complete opposite of what we had last year.

Please let this be a better experience this year. (I don't think it could get much worse.) Fingers crossed!

Mostly Wordless Wednesday

He can't quite figure out how to do it without trying to drown himself.

Man, I love this kid!

#Microblog Monday - Car Trouble

After I had the boys, I searched and searched for a car that would be roomy enough for us as a family but was still comfortable to drive. When I found the SUV I currently drive, I knew right away that it was the car I wanted.

It drives like a car, yet it has got the room of a larger vehicle. It is higher so I can see over the other cars around me. It has heated seats and individualized temp control for the passengers. I love my car.

With Is,aac doing more and more with the boys (school drop off and pick up among other stuff), he is driving my car more often, which leaves me with his car. There were even a few weeks there toward the end of the school year when I had not driven my car at all. Sigh.

I hate driving his car. It is low to the ground, which gives me the feeling of riding in a low rider. I can never get the seat to adjust right (and I do try not to move stuff too much because it is his car), so I am always uncomfortable. I also hate not being able to see what is happening on the road ahead of me.

I suppose it makes me a spoiled brat to get this frustrated over not getting to drive the car I want. I do try to be understanding to a point, but I can't quite get over the feeling that he is getting the best of both worlds here. In fact, if our financial situation was better, I'd have him go find his own car to drive that would accommodate all three of the boys and their car seats, too, so we could avoid car sharing all together.

Is.aac says he doesn't get what my problem is. It's just a car. And it is...but it's not.

What do you think? Would being forced to drive another car in this type of situation bug you, too?

Stop by Mel's for more #MicroBlog Monday posts.

#Microblog Monday

On Friday, we got our first official notice from the boys' school about next year. I opened it, glanced through it, and quickly put it aside. I am not ready for school notices already. Then this weekend, I saw the first advertisement for a back to school sale. I imagine if I actually looked, I would find the aisles in the store dedicated to school complete with signs happily declaring it the "Most Wonderful Time of the Year."

In this area, we have only been out of school for 18 days. Some schools perhaps a week longer. Still, no one goes back until the end of August.

Why is it almost unthinkable to sit back and enjoy the moment? Why must we rush to the next milestone on the calendar? What is the hurry?

Sigh.

18 days into summer and I have read (gasp!) two books already--definitely not as many as I'd like but a luxury nonetheless. It's glorious I have to admit.

The boys have declared their boredom and then moved off to find something else to do.

We've started working on the backyard. We have cleared an area for a large inflatable pool. We've started working on a garden box for planting some veggies.

I don't want to rush onto the next big date.

I don't want to think about the end of summer.

I want to relax and every moment of the time we've been given.

In fact, I'm planning on doing just that!

Stop by Mel's for more #Microblog Monday posts.

Friday Night Leftovers

It's been a rough couple of weeks, so rough, in fact, that it is hard to not feel like we have some sort of black cloud of doom hanging over us...

Somewhere around Memorial Day I got sick. Actually, a number of us at work got sick. Unfortunately, while everyone else quickly kicked their illnesses, I only got sicker. And sicker. My sore throat morphed into a sinus infection (which the doctor refused to give me meds for until I got much worse), which in turn turned into an ear infection, which then led to a ruptured eardrum. In the middle of all of that, I was diagnosed with a UTI, because hell, why not go all out, right? Sigh.

Two antibiotics later, and I am still getting over it all. My energy levels are still not back up to where they should be.

It has been brutal.

~~~

It was at about that time when the boys' school sent home notices from the county health department that they had been exposed to Pertussis. Now, yes, they are fully vaccinated. Still, I don't exactly want to test their immunity by having them (or us for that matter) directly exposed.

~~~

Is.aac also got a notice from the un.employ.ment office that he had been overpaid back in January of 2014. He was required to pay back $350 immediately or go to a hearing. It's a convoluted story that would take forever to explain, but in the end he was not overpaid. Still he lost the hearing and he has to appeal the finding. Now we are fighting to contact the un.employ.ment office. It has proven to be nearly impossible because it looks like they don't actually want to talk to anyone. (Seriously, they work 4 hours a day, have an automated phone system that reroutes you over and over again without any option to actually speak to someone or leave a message...it's awful.) We will see where this goes. It feels a lot like they are trying to break us so we just pay them the money to stop the headache. I hate bureaucracy.

~~~

We had to call the electric company because we kept losing power to half of our house. Apparently that happens when the connection that leads from the power lines at the pole to your house get corroded. It took them 10 days to make it to our house after repeated calls. It took the guy 10 minutes to fix the issue. While we were waiting, our television quit after one of the outages. Awesome.

~~~

We had a series of issues with the boys' teacher. She has repeatedly angered me in how she treats Sh.awn. The latest examples included her giving out "yearbooks" she created to the class. It had all of the student ID pictures, as well as a few pages of snapshots from the things the class did throughout the year. Sh.awn wasn't in a single picture outside of the ID picture. To top it off, she wrote a note in Ja.son's yearbook but didn't in Sh.awn's. I asked Jay if he asked her to write in his book. He said no, she just came over on her own and wrote in it.

I can't tell you how angry I am. I am so glad we are done with her.

~~~

Is.aac and Jack dropped my laptop and broke the heads on the hard drive. The hard drive is now unreadable without replacing the head, and that gets pricey. And no, I hadn't yet backed everything up. And yes, I will have to pay (probably a lot) to have the data recovered. This is after having to replace the hard drive. Awesome again.

~~~

Sh.awn lost another therapist. Sigh. He is not good with change, and I fear there are going to be some transition pains. Here's hoping the new one is decent and the transition goes smoothly.

~~~

All of the above is on top of some stressful things happening at work. I am hoping with the onset of summer vacation that things will get less crazy and stressful. Fingers crossed.

Stop by Danifred's for more Leftovers. I'd link to her blog, but I lost all my bookmarks when my hard drive died and I am not feeling the whole searching thing right now.

Speaking of dead hard drive, I need all your blog addresses again. :( You could leave them in a comment and I won't publish them if you would rather me not...

This and That

The end of the school year is upon us. Like every other year, I am under intense stress with the unshakable feeling of having way to much to do yet not enough time to do it.

I am dragging myself toward the finish line, Just 15 more days. I hope I can make it.

~~~

I went on a field trip with my boys this week. Watching my boys' teacher AVOID her eager and fun first grade students while we were at the zoo for the day truly shocked me. It was an eye-opening experience that spotlighted that she is really just not very good with kids at all. This revelation is simultaneously a relief and a major disappointment.

Now I know the issues we've had this year had less to do about my kid and more to do with her struggles as a teacher/person in general.

Less Than 7 Weeks

I get out of school in less than 7 weeks.

More importantly, the boys get out of school in less than 7 weeks.

I am back to being frustrated with their school. Sigh.

I have yet another IEP meeting on Monday. It's looking like I get to go back and fight. Again. Over the same damn thing.

~~~

This week was Teacher Appreciation Week. The boys made cute little vases and candy flowers to take for theirs. I have to say that it was a challenge for me to be excited to make a gift for the boys to take to their teacher this year.

I am less than fond of her.

Like not fond at all.

There have been a things popping up all year long...and I have the strong feeling she doesn't like one of my kids. You can feel any way you want about the students in your class. Sometimes, there are even kids who are challenging and not your favorite, I suppose.

But you NEVER let them know you don't care for them. And you better make sure the parents don't get that sense. In our case, all of us know. It's obvious she likes one boy; it's even more obvious she doesn't like the other. Sigh.

Anyway, I wouldn't have sent anything to her and feigned forgetfulness, but there are some support teachers who I do like and wanted to acknowledge. So I sucked it up.

Let me tell you, finishing up gifts for a teacher I don't care for while knowing that my own students will likely not even acknowledge T.A. Day for me was like pouring salt on the wound.

The boys were happy. The teacher responded in an appropriate manner. The support teachers were thrilled and made sure we knew it. In the end it was okay.

~~~

We have started our testing at my school. We have blocked four weeks of testing for students. They are going to take somewhere around 10 hours of tests (they are untimed) on the computers and approximately two hours of the standard bubble in tests.

It is ridiculous.

The worst part is that I'll only have a few weeks after testing to finish all that I have to teach. There is not enough time! I always feel the crunch for time at the end of the year, but this time it feels even worse than it has in the past.

~~~

Less than 7 weeks left.

Bring it.

I'm done.

#Microblog Mondays - Work Woes

My room at work is near the center of the school at the end of one of the main hallways. Most teachers pass by my room to get to the office or the lunch room, and nearly half generally pass my room to get to their cars in the parking lot.

What this means is that a lot of people end up "stopping by" my room to chat.

This on the surface shouldn't be that big of a deal. In theory they'd stop in, say hello, and then head on their way. Unfortunately, what happens in reality is that people stop in, unload all that troubles them, and then (far too long later) merrily go on their way.

Sigh.

I know there are worse work woes to have. I mean, it should be kind of nice that people are so friendly. Hey, they like me! And I guess that it is nice to an extent.

But, it occurred to me today after the eighth--YES EIGHTH--person popped in to chat that this can't go on any longer. Not only am I too nice to do my work while they talk, although I was less interested in being nice as the afternoon worn on, I've decided that I need to not take on the added weight of other people's problems.

I do not want to know if so and so made them angry.

I do not want to know about students who didn't do what they should have.

I definitely do not need to know every nuance of their relationship with their husbands.

I do not need anything more than my own life to worry about nor do I need to inherit extra frustration or stress. I have enough of all of that without them adding to my everyday load.

Let's face it, I barely have enough time for my own life crap; I don't need to deal with theirs.

Besides, I am not the school's personal therapist.

Sheesh.

Now I just need to figure out how to get the message out...I've found working in a room with the lights off sounds a whole lot more appealing than it is in practice.

Anyone else ever been in a similar position? Any tips for how to handle this without making work miserable?

~~~

Stop by Mel's for more Microblog Monday posts.

Weekend Leftovers

Today was my birthday. I got to sleep in a little, and there was a huge chunk of time in which I was sent to my room, ALONE, so they could decorate the house. It was wonderful! :)

Is.aac also took the boys to the store to pick out gifts for me. lol. Sh.awn chose a Goofy figure. Jack selected a harmonica for me. Ja.son decided I was in desperate need of two construction cars. They also made me a picture frame.

We had cake and ice cream and spent some time with my mom, too. It was a nice day all around.

~~~

Yesterday my 92 year old grandmother in AZ called (here in CA) and told my mom she wasn't feeling well. Long story short, my mom ended up calling one of her neighbors who in turn called 911. Grandma was taken to the ER where she has been since. Some of the scarier possibilities have been ruled out, but they weren't exactly sure what was going on last I heard. She is on oxygen at the moment because she was SATting low. We're worried about her because let's face it--she's 92 and lives alone.

My mom is heading out there for the next ten days to be with her.

~~~

We got these...

How cute are my boys in their spring pictures? :)

~~~

Decided to potty train Jack over this break. He's four. It's time. (Mostly because he has his 4 year appointment on the 23rd, and I was dreading having to say he wasn't trained yet. Sigh) He's proving to be a tough case.

~~~

I think I mentioned some time back that Sh.awn was diagnosed with AD.HD. We started him on a very low dose of medication, and he was doing so well...until recently. Ugh. He We all were really struggling.

We ended up increasing his dosage of medication. It has made a WORLD of difference. I am so relieved that we were able to help him return to the sweet boy we know and love. The best part is that he has been so much happier since we've changed his dosage.

~~~

This is the last weekend of my spring break. I am not looking forward to going back and starting all of our S..B.C.C testing. My eighth graders are looking at somewhere around 14 hours of testing over a ten day period. Sigh. It all just frustrates me.

~~~

Stop by Danifred's for more Leftovers!

8 Years

8 years ago today I started blogging. I was just starting my third IVF, the one that brought me the boys.

It seems like a million years ago.

It seems like it was yesterday.

It is cliche to say so much has happened.

So much has changed--some for the bad.

So much more for the good.

The me of 8 years ago was so hopeful and excited. She was ready to conquer the world and have her dreams finally realized.

I'm a bit lot more jaded now, a bit lot more leery of the twists and turns of life. What wasn't battered by infertility was beaten by everything that has happened since.

I'm definitely a lot more tired.

But I've survived.

And I do think the hope and excitement is there.

They might look a little different than they did 8 years ago. I would say pretty much everything about me is different than it was back then. But if I push away the rough edges I can see them shining in the background, waiting to work their charm.

I am thankful for that.

Oh these 8 years.

I can't think of a way to end this post, probably because the story isn't over. I guess I'll end this by saying thank you.

For being here.

For reading and commenting.

And for your support during this journey.

Good Things

Jen at Here We Go Again had a post about things she loved. She asked her readers to post in the comment section about things they love, too. I think this is such a fun idea and a great way to learn about new things I might like to try, so I thought I'd do a similar post here. (I hope you don't mind, Jen!)

These are the things I left in the comment section of Jen's post:

• The first is a different type of snap hair clip that actually stays in my fine hair. Rather than the usual one prong, this clip has three prongs. My Target sells them in black, which is how I found them. I love these things.
• The second thing is something I got to solve an issue my boys have drinking from a plastic bottle (water bottle, etc) whenever we are out and about. Essentially, this is an adapter system that fits on most juice/water bottles that converts the opening of the bottles to noless-spill drinks. Plus, the adapters are small enough for me to keep in my bag without taking much room. We've used them a lot. :) 

Those two things immediately popped into my head that day, but I've been thinking about more things I love ever since I read her post. 

• The CoverBot External Battery - We are a techy family, and Is.aac and I use our phones a lot to take pictures, text each other when we divide and conquer or crew, and yes, sometimes to distract our children when we have various appointments to attend. This little gadget has saved us many a time when we need a quick recharge while out. I love that it has two USB ports and can easily charge the phones or  iPads (or LeapPads) if needed. I loved these things so much that I gave a bunch of them out as Christmas gifts two years ago!

• 4 Port USB Wall Charger - One outlet. 4 things charged at once. Love.

• Eggsact Egg Timer - Stick this thing in the pot with the eggs when you start them cooking and leave. Take them off the stove when the color has reached the appropriate level of doneness. I've had it for years, and it works every time. (Been cooking a lot of eggs lately.)

• Laminator - I'm a teacher, what can I say? lol. I have one at work and one at home because you just never know when something will need to be laminated. :) This year I'm also giving one of these to the boys' teachers at school. (Only I paid less than half of the price I linked. Watch this product, it goes on sale fairly frequently.)

Now it's your turn. I know not many people comment here any more. Heck, maybe they never visit either? Still, if you're out there, I'd love to see what things you're loving right now.

#MicroBlog Monday

The boys get to play a little iPad each day. Mostly they play learning apps, although at some point not too long ago, the youngest discovered the wonder of YouTube. Specifically, he discovered the wonder of Ki.nder Su.rprise eggs videos.

Now, I seriously do not understand the obsession with these clips, but from my queries on FB it seems that these videos have caught the attention of a lot of kids. I admit to being a little relieved in that my kid isn't some sort of oddity in the Ki.nder egg addiction.

Anyway, with the youngest's birthday and Easter on the way, I thought it would be a neat idea to procure some of these surprise eggs for him. I only needed to search for a bit before I quickly realized that it just wasn't going to happen. They aren't sold in the U.S., and what I could find on ebay were ridiculously overpriced.

I couldn't believe it when my next door neighbor, upon reading of my egg dilemma on FB, brought over two of the eggs she just happened to have brought back from a recent trip to Mexico. I practically kissed her when she showed up at my door with them in hand. When does something like that happen? I was so excited to give them to him.

Fast forward to the boy's birthday. He opened them. He oohed. He ahhed. He was amazed. He has carried around his two ridiculously cheap toy prizes since he opened them. It was, by all intents and purposes, a huge hit with the boy.

But in the process of fulfilling a simple joy for him, I have created a monster--foil uncovering, egg smashing monster.

And it was a sad misfortune of timing that this monster has been created at Easter time, because dude. You cannot begin to realize how many things are foil wrapped and egg shaped at the Easter season until you have a child hell bent on destroying every single one of them in order to unleash a "hidden" toy inside.

I have foil and chocolate remnants all over the freaking house now! Definitely not how I expected things to play out. lol

It seems that the boy has a bit of his mother's ability to throw herself full force into whatever interests her. Ahem. Thank goodness Easter is over and we can finally rid ourselves of the foil/egg temptations for another year. :)


Stop by Mel's for more #Microblog Monday posts.

The Boy Is 4

Jack's Birthday Video...

The Last Night of Three

Oh this boy.

This crazy and maddening and wonderful and fun and AMAZING boy. 

(His latest selfie.)

This boy who loves orange, being scared, jumping, Popsicles, and the song "All About the Bass."

This boy who is ALWAYS on the go.

We just tucked him in bed and kissed away the magical and oh so fun year of three. 

Tomorrow he'll wake up 4.

Leftovers

Things have been a little tense around these parts of late. For the last several weeks, Ja.son has been battling headaches, which for us, is never a good thing. My gut said it sinus infection based on the location of the headache. I started to freak a little (or a lot), however, when he started throwing up earlier this week.

After 5 visits to the pediatrician (seeing a different doctor each time - sigh) over a three week period, an allergic reaction to amoxicillin, nearly $300 in co-pays and prescription costs, and missing 8 days of school, we finally have gone over 24 hours without a headache.

It has been real. I am downright exhausted.

~~~

I feel I must again assert my disdain for my insurance company. Apparently if there is a gap to the "effectiveness" of this insurance company's coverage, I will find it. The latest was getting a script for the same antibiotic on the weekend and finding that I cannot fill an identical script within a 6 month period at an out of company pharmacy. (Mind you, there is no other option for a weekend in-company weekend pharmacy in our area, and I had gotten both scripts on Sundays at the urgent care.) I ended up having to pay full price for the script of antibiotics because I couldn't drive an hour (each way) to the 24 hour in-company that is available to have it filled and I refused to make my boy wait until the next day for relief.

I hate them.

~~~

While we were dealing with all of the worry over Ja.son's headache, I had another issue with the boys' teacher over some of her questionable decisions regarding Sh.awn. I sent her an email explaining my concern. Her response was to call another IEP team meeting (Although not unheard of, a teacher calling a full IEP team meeting is something that just isn't done around here. I can't imagine many people are happy with her right now because of it.) because I called her out on what she was planning on doing. Frankly, at this point enough has happened that I have little respect for her as a teacher, which is just sad.

Things will likely be interesting at the meeting. It's on Wednesday.

~~~

I also went to a large conference in Palm Springs at the end of February. A fellow colleague and I presented an activity that we do. It went really well; we had well over 60 people at our 7:45 am session (and they all stayed the whole time). I was also able to go to some other good sessions, and I learned a lot.

So, later that afternoon, I ran into the principal that is at my boys' school.

And oh yes he brought up what's going on with Sh.awn!

I tell you, only I would manage to be 4 hours away from home and still manage to run into drama. I was minding my own business, too!

~~~

16 days until Jack turns 4. I can't even deal. It's going too fast.

~~~

Is.aac got a ticket yesterday for having his cell phone in his hand while he was driving. He says he wasn't on it, but it didn't matter. There goes somewhere around $160 in a blink of an eye.

~~~

Stop by Danifred's for more Leftovers.

Poor Pitiful

The plague is upon us yet again...

:( Two down. Only one to go.

#MicroBlog Monday - Power of Words

"I love you," I told him as I tucked him.

"I don't love you," he replied.

Stricken, I kissed him again and went to his brother for his goodnight.

This has been a challenging weekend. One has discovered the power of words, wielding hateful things whenever he can simply to see the affect they have on their intended recipient.

The hard part for me is that it's come from nowhere, really. Usually he is the one who randomly calls out to me to check in. He's the snuggler, the lover.

So this stage - please let it be a stage - has hit me hard.

The first time it happened, I didn't handle it very well. In fact, my reaction may have been the stimulus to continue. He knew this tactic had hit home. (All while still managing to randomly call out his love to me in between the ugly.)

Right now my response it to give him no response and turn my attention to something else. But I don't know if even that is the right way to handle this. I just hope it ends soon.

Sigh.

~~~

Stop by Mel's for more #MicroBlog Monday posts.

#Microblog Mondays - Why?

Why is it that my kids always have to go to the bathroom (read poop) when we have to leave for somewhere? Seriously, we start getting ready to go out long before we have to leave, but it never fails.

~~~

Why is it that my eyes pop open at an ungodly hour on the weekends, a time I "can"* sleep in, but they refuse to open on the weekdays when I have to get up?

~~~

Why is it that it never fails that I crave the one food that we do not have in our house at that moment? It's like my body knows and tries to torment me.

~~~

Why does my littlest child continue to get himself stuck in the exact same position under his bed every. single. night? You'd think he'd learn that what he's doing isn't a good idea by this point.

~~~

Why must insurance companies make things so difficult? I was on the phone with our insurance company for over thirty minutes this afternoon, (I hate them.) and we still do not have a resolution to our issue at this point. I have no idea how much longer I'll have to waste on the phone trying to get them to do what they should do. Grr.

~~~

Is there anything going on in your life that makes you ask why?


Stop by Mel's for more #Microblog Monday posts. :)



*As you know, when you have little people around, "can" is a relative term.

Just Because

It makes me smile. :)

#Microblog Monday

"Mom, why are my legs on backwards?" he asked just after dinner.

I stopped what I was doing and looked at him. "What do you mean your legs are backwards?"

"That's what Daniel asked me. He wanted to know why my legs were backwards." He looked down. "It sort of looks like they are. See?"

"Babe, your legs are not backwards. Your legs are just the way they are supposed to be... What did you say to Daniel after he asked you that?"

"I told him I was born very early and my brain got hurt and that now it takes a little more concentration to get my legs to do what I want them to do."

"That's a really good answer, Jay. What did he say when you told him that?"

"He didn't say anything. It was time for recess anyway. We went to go play basketball." He turned away then, picking up his police car as he started making siren sounds. It was clear our conversation was done.

He didn't say anything more about it the rest of the evening, yet I can't get the moment out of my head...

Sigh.

~~~

Stop by Mel's for more #Microblog Monday posts.

Ja.son's Day!

7 years ago on Thursday, after 100 days in the NICU, we got to bring our Ja.son home. I gave him the choice of celebrating his day on the 4th, his actual Homecoming Day, or today. He chose today so he would get the full benefit of his day. I'm fairly certain he got his money's worth by waiting. :)

 

 

Ja.son took full advantage of his day. He chose a breakfast of pancakes with whipped crème and chocolate chips.

It was raining out today, so like his brother, Ja.son chose to hang out around the house.

 

He picked his favorite movie, the Lego Movie, to watch and controlled the television all day long.

 

 

We played a LOT of Draw Something (and the iPad) today, too.

It was no surprise when he wanted to have pizza for dinner. Our boy is a huge fan of pizza!

 

Then after he blew out his candles and ate his cake, he played cars with his daddy.

 Happy Homecoming Day, Ja.son! Hope you had a great day!

Sh.awn's Day

Yesterday was Sh.awn's Day. 7 years ago yesterday, Shawn came home from the NICU. He was 90 days old.

7 years ago yesterday, after spending so much time in the between--parents yet unable to be care takers--we actually had a child in our home.



I honestly didn't know what to do with myself, especially because I am not exactly sure I truly believed we'd ever get to take them home.

~~~

Yesterday we celebrated Sh.awn and his Homecoming.

He reveled in the chance to call all the shots for the day, eat cake, and open a present.

He loved the idea of a day all for himself, something that is extra nice when you are a twin.

And while it is important for me to give Sh.awn a day to feel special, we celebrate Sh.awn's Homecoming Day because I am so very thankful we have him in our lives.

Happy Homecoming Day, Sh.awn!

Random Thoughts About Dreams

This article came up on my FB feed the other day. Generally I'd bypass this type of thing, but the teaser about things that influence my dreams caught my attention. Most of the list didn't interest me, but the section that talked about your sleep position affecting your dreams gave me pause, especially because I now sleep on my (according to this list) infamous left side.

Lately, my dreams have been crazy. I mean, my dreams are pretty wild on a regular basis, but when I am stressed, my dreams are ramped up to the nth degree. Unfortunately, I've fallen into a cycle of going to bed exhausted, running from things chasing me all night long (which is a common dream although there are other fun ones mixed in), and then waking up just as exhausted.

I have no idea if the study linked in this article has been debunked or even replicated, but it is an interesting thought. Of course, I also found a study that said night owls are more likely to experience nightmares. Apparently I'm screwed twice over. lol

Oh yeah, and there is that stress I'm feeling at play, too. I'm screwed over thrice! I can't win here!

So what about you guys. Anyone else a left side sleeper with vivid dreams? Any night owls plagued by nightmares?

#MicroBlog Monday

I've been sitting here in front of a blank screen for a while now. I'll type. I'll erase. Type. Erase. Over and over again. I work with a few words for a while and then wipe the slate clean. I suppose it takes some of the pressure off when I expect to do the same with the words I'm typing now.

Life is back to feeling overwhelming and I am unsettled. It's nothing big, exactly, that leaves me feeling this way, unless you consider the myriad of little/medium things a big thing in their sum. Maybe that is what it is--nothing by itself but everything together.

I guess life is funny like that.

Anyway, all I can do is wait for the fog to clear. I'll find my mojo again soon enough.

For more #Microblog Monday posts, stop by Mel's Stirrup Queen.

#Microblog Monday

Today the big boys go back to school after a three week vacation. It's been a nice break, but unfortunately, it's been long enough for us to get out of our routine. Yesterday at lunch we talked about finally getting the chance to go back.

J is nervous; his stomach hurt last night, a symptom of his worries. He was almost as nervous as he was before the start of school. Thankfully, he seems a little better this morning. Excitement has mixed with the nerves now.

~~~

Sh.awn was visibly upset yesterday while we talked about returning to school. He knows he'll be working with his new aide, and he struggled with the emotions of the new situation. For the first time, S's old aide, whom he LOVED, will not be there today.

"But why does she not want to be with me any more?" he asked. "Is it because I wasn't good?"

Oh man. Talk about ripping my heart in two.

Of course I explained again that this change had nothing to do with him. I even reminded him of his new aide and talked about how nice she is. He said he understood, but still.

My heart aches. My poor boy.

For him, this change is nothing less than a break-up, one in which he had no idea was coming until it happened. I'm sure it's hard for him to take it any other way than it was something he did when things like 'higher pay' means absolutely nothing to him.

All he cares about is that a person he loved left him.

He didn't say much about it when he woke up today. I didn't bring it up with him either. I know he knows, and I don't want to set the course of his day negatively because I upset him before it started. I simply kissed him on his cheek and wished him a good day like I usually do before I head out to work.

I hope that his day goes well. I hope that he is reminded how kind this new aide is. I hope he quickly learns to love this aide. It won't replace the loss he feels about his old aide leaving, but maybe it will help ease the sting.

Stop by Mel's for more #Microblog Monday posts.

#Microblog Monday - Snuggles

I'm lucky in that my boys love to snuggle. It is not unusual for one to crawl up on the couch next to me and wrap their arms around me.

I love it, and oh how I hope they never outgrow it.

There is something, though, about snuggling with Sh.awn. Holding him always, always makes me fall asleep. I don't know how to explain it, and it is something that doesn't happen with my other boys.

Of all my boys, he is the one about whom I worry most.

He challenges me (and my parenting) the most.

It could be argued that he also brings me the most frustration as a parent.

And yet, he is the one who calms me, who can bring me back into the moment, just like that.

When I snuggle him, all is right in the world...

Oh how I love this sweet boy.

~~~

Stop by Mel's for more #Microblog Monday posts.