Sigh...Why Does It Always Have To Be Difficult?

Well, the lab apparently lost my blood and that is why the results are not in yet. The clinic has some of my blood frozen and will send it out to get it tested. It better not be to the same idiots (lab) that screwed up the last two times. I can't do this test while pregnant, so it is a good thing they had blood on ice. I am still so frustrated that it really makes me boil. They are playing with my life. All I am getting is the run around. I hate it.



I will start lovenox on Friday. They are not making me wait for the retest...we will error on the side of caution. In my heart of hearts, I think the results will still be positive and confirm the first test. When they told me about the Protein S deficiency, it just felt right. I can't explain it more than that. Maybe it's woman's intuition?



So, I am keeping my fingers crossed until Friday that my bean(s) stick like crazy. I am on all of the extra folic acid and b vitamin and I must admit that I do feel different from the last time...so...I am praying my hardest.



I hpt'ed today, but the results for 13dpo look a lot like 12 dpo. That makes me a little nervous. I wanted to see a darker line! I hope it is because I didn't hold my urine long enough and diluted my hcg. It still says I am pregnant, so I guess I should be happy with that and not worry about anything else.



Shouldn't this be the happiest time in my life? Shouldn't I be able to enjoy getting a positive hpt like everyone else? I know it is because I've been through too much. I know too much. Why does it always have to be so difficult?