It's Prematurity Awareness Month, so the posts about the topic are starting to pop up all over my feed. Many of them are about how thankful they are about the doctors and nurses who helped their children when they were so tiny and fragile.
I guess I am thankful to them, too, but in all honesty, I rarely think of them much anymore. I can't for the life of me remember the names of the nurses--none of them come to mind, not even the ones I truly loved. I remember the two neos; one name remembered without issue, the other more doom and gloom predicting neo, takes much more effort.
That's horrible, right?
Other posts talk about how their children have overcome prematurity and are now healthy and strong.
While my boys are now healthy and strong right now, the nagging fear of prematurity is still (may always be) there. Will this illness be the one to tax their lungs to their limits? Is this episode of vomiting a "simple" illness, or will it mean a trip to the ER and surgery? Besides that, the idea of overcoming prematurity is kind of lost on me.
How do you overcome prematurity when it is the reason for your children's challenges today?
I don't know.
I need people to understand prematurity and know that prematurity is more than tiny babies born too soon.
I desperately want to make sure no other family endures the heartache of watching their loved one struggle for survival.
My heart aches at the knowledge that prematurity will steal other families' babies and rob others of their dreams.
And I hate prematurity with a passion...
... and yet ...
I am stuck on how to deal with Prematurity Awareness Month this year.
How do I articulate my thankfulness that because of the strides of prematurity research I now have two amazing boys along with my intense, overwhelming detest for something that took so much from us?
Sigh.
I just don't know.
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1 day ago
2 comments:
Oh, I hear you. I think some people think of prematurity as a stage. As a moment in time. But for some, there is no closure, no looking backwards because they're still in prematurity, years later.
Prematurity is scary. No doubt about it. I feel lucky. We escaped the lasting effects that could have been a result of my babies being early. My heart goes out to you for it being a constant part of your lives. However, as you said, I am also so very thankful for the technology that we have today that helped your boys survive their early days. I am so incredibly thankful that medicine has come so far that my babies came through okay. But my heart hurts for those families that don't have the same outcome as either one of us.
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