Finding Peace of Mind

I was doing some research online and came across this article by Su.san Je.ffers, Ph.D. (Okay, I'll admit that I was trying to earn more Swag Bucks. I won 22 bucks, so it was worth it. :-) What? You don't look up random key phrases like "ways to look for the good in life" in your free time? Ahem.)

Anyway, the point is that I found this article, and I like what it has to say.

I want to stay "awake." I want continue that feeling I had on the weekend--to embrace the todays and feel good about the tomorrows.

My plan for a while is to take each of the nine strategies Je.ffers suggests and play with it...Explore it...Conquer it...Change my way of thinking...and ultimately rewire this old brain of mine a little bit at a time.

I think I can do this.

I am making this my own little experiment.* When I am done, I hope wonder (look there! I already started using principle number 2!) if this will become a habit. How cool would that be?

Let's begin:

#1. "'Un-set' your heart." Definition: Un-setting your heart means letting go of your picture of how you want it all to be. It means letting go of trying to control things over which you have no control.

Starting with a biggie, huh Je.ffers? It's alright. I can take it.

Je.ffers states that "One of the prime causes of our suffering is our wanting things to be different than they are." I can see how that is the case in my life. Life didn't go as planned, and I clearly didn't get a life that matches the ideals I set for myself. So, it makes sense that the first step to mastering this principle is to figure out what the hell my expectations are.

Part 1: My expectations...

1. ...to have baby making be as easy for us as it seems to be for so many other people.


2. ...to take home my babies straight from the hospital when they are born.


3. ...to have healthy children.


4. ...to be able to play ball with my kids outside.


5. ...to feel connected to and loved by my husband.


6. ...to be blissfully unaware of the bad things life can bring.


7. ...to live normally and have a family like everyone else.


8. ...to be able to do it all--and do it all well.


9. ...to have both my parents enjoy their long awaited grandchildren.


10. ...to not have to fight so damn hard for what seems like everything.


11. ...to have my confidence and not be so afraid of so much around me.

There are many more, I am sure. I might just continue to add them as they come to me over the next several days. These listed are just the ones that immediately popped into my head as I was sitting here writing.

Part 2: Now that I am thinking about the ideals I had created in my head, the next step is to un-set my heart from the reality that I imagined--and can't achieve. That's easier said than done.

I guess I first need to work on realizing that I can and do have now (or the opportunity for) a version of everything I have listed above.

I never really thought about it like that. Um, that is a pretty mind blowing thought right there.

I can and do have a version of everything I have listed above...

Really?

Seriously?

Why hasn't that occurred to me before?

I don't have to drop my expectations, just redefine them to something workable with the life we have now.

Whoa.

Now I can't wait to see what tomorrow brings when I explore this topic further!

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*Anyone else wanna play along? Let me know. Shoot, all I need is a nifty badge and we'd be all set!